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When is it enough?

January 6, 2018


Oh no, not another article about sexual harassment! Try as I might no matter what you are listening to, watching, talking about, it always seems to return to this subject. I have another thought on this subject now that some time has passed. It took a little soul searcher and watching and listening, but I needed to share this.

I would never presume how you felt when you first heard about Harvey Weinstein. Maybe some of you didn’t even know who he was. Being the movie freak I am, that doesn’t mean watching, it means I’m one of those people that watches the credits all the way through at the end of the movie. I go see a movie because of who was behind the camera, not in front. I’d go into detail, but it should suffice to say I have a degree in Film History and my family was in the film industry in the middle of the Golden Age of Film.

I actually wasn’t surprised about Weinstein, I had heard through the Hollywood and vine, not the grapevine, that he was a letch. As a new accuser would step up and name someone else, I’m sure the shock hit you more than others did. For me, it was when Kevin Spacey was accused. I had my suspicions that he may bat for the other team, but didn’t realize his bat was used like a caveman’s club. I’d always respected him as an actor and liked him the first time I ever saw him in Usual Suspects. Like so many others, my interest in him was renewed with “House of Cards”.  

Damn him, how could he do this to me?! Exactly, I took it personally that he was a creep and pervert. How could I have been so deceived? I’ll admit I have lost interest in the new breed in Hollywood, as they just seem like self-absorbed spoiled children to me. But how could someone I enjoyed watching, appreciated his work through the years do this?

The list of accusers and accused grew and grew, and eventually it finally hit me. Does anybody really know anybody? We all have secrets that we don’t share with friends or family. Ask yourself this, do you really want anyone to really know you? Hells bells, most of us don’t even know ourselves, let alone someone else knowing us.

The disconnect some of us felt when we heard about Weinstein, Spacey, Lauer, Hill, etc. is real, not imaginary. These are people that we invited into our homes and in some cases, we trusted them with our feelings. Whether you admit or not, many of the accused made an impact on our lives. Maybe reporting the news, performing in a movie or television show, playing a televised sport, whatever the case, these accused took us away from our busy and stressful lives. It may have been for just an hour or two, but in lieu of Calgon taking you away, they did. They became in many ways part of your life and when you heard they were capable of doing something so distasteful, so vile, it is only human nature to feel a disconnect.

Just when you think it is safe to go back in the waters of feeling there actually are some people that are capable of good behavior, another person is accused. I’ve noticed however, that some people seem to be almost jaded with their response. Have we lost the ability to trust anyone? I hope not, because then, as a society I’m afraid we will revert to caveman like behavior.

I think it is good that we have a disconnect when we hear a new accuser, it means we can still be shocked. It also means we haven’t become complacent about this type of behavior, nor should we ever be. Politician, actor, sports figure, boss, whoever, the men with power are, will hopefully pause before they exhibit this type of behavior. And I hope we continue to feel a disconnect.

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